7/24/17: Handling Hurts

Life is full of joys and sorrows, pleasure and pain, uplift and disappointment. Besides the biggies like devastating disease, the end of a relationship, or death of a loved one, what hurts you? What situation can happen that turns the tide of a perfectly wonderful day into a destructive tsunami? For me, it’s misjudgment. When someone takes my words or actions out of context, completely misjudging my intentions and my motives, and spins them into something that I wasn’t even thinking.

I receive such misjudgments as attacks upon my personal character. And when I try to explain what I was thinking, to have my explanations rebuffed as well just further twists the knife. I know what I’m thinking. I know what I meant. I know what my intentions were. I know I am not what I’m being accused of, yet there is nothing I can do or say to change the other person’s opinion. And hurts of this kind only matter when the other person is someone who matters to me.

So what do I do? First, I shut down. That’s my way of managing the pain, of shielding myself from further onslaught. Then I start to strategize. My thought is, Fine, I will never give you another opening to attack me on that line again. Mind you, the strategy is not put in place because I think the person is right. The strategy is put in place so that I will be out of the line of fire of his/her misjudgment. That may mean that conversation about that subject won’t happen again, that activity won’t be shared, or I will just stop dealing with that person altogether. Since my motives were pure and right, and my explanation was disregarded, there’s nothing more to say about the subject. I’ll have to just be hurt because the other person cares not about my feelings and refuses to regard my explanations as plausible.

Oh, I want to yell back. Frankly, I want to spice my retorts with choice words that Christians ought not use. I want to defend myself and I want that person to see me the way I intended. Then I remember that Romans 12:17-18 says, “Repay no one evil for evil. Have regard for good things in the sight of all men. If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men” (NKJ).

I have to get quiet. I have to hold back. I have to not pay back evil. I have to think of the good in the other person. I have to live peaceably with that person. I have to pray. I have to rely on God to work it out.

______________________

©2017 Sharon Norris Elliott. Feel free to forward this devotion in its entirety, including this copyright line. Leave comments, ask questions, read past devotions, or subscribe to receive these devotions daily in your e-mail at www.sanewriter.wordpress.com. Also, periodically check in at www.LifeThatMatters.net to see what’s going on in the ministry.

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~ by sanewriter on July 24, 2017.

One Response to “7/24/17: Handling Hurts”

  1. This is true all me

    On Jul 24, 2017 12:57 PM, “Sanewriter’s Blog: A Heart for the Word” wrote:

    > sanewriter posted: “Life is full of joys and sorrows, pleasure and pain, > uplift and disappointment. Besides the biggies like devastating disease, > the end of a relationship, or death of a loved one, what hurts you? What > situation can happen that turns the tide of a perfectly ” >

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